So, how's that diet going?

I figured I'd better explain before I'm asked.

Well...it hasn't been going so well.
I have been limiting my portions still, but I haven't been paying as much attention about WHAT I eat. I almost wish that my curse of being sick all the time from Metformin would come back. After all, the sickness would only happen when I ate something that probably wasn't the greatest for me.

I've been doing fairly well with Breakfast. I usually eat an apple and it will last me for the majority of the morning. I'm also trying to at least drink 32 oz of water a day. But, when it comes to lunch and dinner...I continue to have issues with what to make and eat. We have eaten out quite a bit in the last two weeks.

I have yo-yo'd from 10 pounds to 12 pounds to 13 pounds lost. I haven't seen the 13 pounds lost mark in about a week...so, in a way, I'm maintaining the 10 pounds I lost, but I'm not making any headway. This is also due to the fact that I haven't been exercising.

This week is a new week. I kick-started my exercising again on Saturday by taking an hour and a half walk at Pinson mounds, complete with going up and down the stairs to the largest mound, sprinting at times (we had our puggles with us) and walking briskly.

So, on Monday, I really need to go to the gym. I'm going to have to make myself some way or another. You would think that if I wanted a baby so badly, I would be working my tail off (literally) to lose as much of this weight as possible.

I guess I have experienced extreme frustration because I'm not seeing immediate results. Although the Metformin is supposed to eventually bring back my natural cycle...it hasn't yet. This is month 5 without a period. And I am just so dang frustrated. My ob/gyn told me that we can't pursue other methods of fertility until I have had one year of normal cycles. What she meant is basically all of the cycles I have not had a period have been a waste, and cannot be counted toward a full year of trying to conceive. So, basically, I can only account for December to March. Four months. So, once I DO get a regular cycle, if I am still having significant problems, they won't be addressed until another eight months down the line.

Of course, she also told me we would talk about Clomid* next time I come in on September 21st. I don't want the run around. I am going to all but demand they give Clomid, along with something to kick start my period. The longer I go without a cycle, the worse it's going to be. The longer I go, the more likely it will be a cycle that will put me out of work for at least a day. And I can't really afford that, because I don't have enough sick days accumulated due to having to use so many when I first got on Metformin. I have to accumulate a total of 6 sick days by October 31st, and I still have another sick day I'm going to need to take due to my appointment on September 21st. I have been apprehensive in the past about taking something to kick start my period. I've wanted to regulate it naturally. But pretty soon, it will mean I've only had a period for half of the year...which is just not healthy or good anyway.

*For those of you that don't know, Clomid is a medication that is taken to help me ovulate. Obviously, because I am not having periods, I am not ovulating. My body is having issues ovulating like a normal female. If I don't ovulate, there is no possible chance I can become pregnant.
Now, although I would be thrilled that my possibility of pregnancy would be increased through taking Clomid, I am NOT so thrilled about the side effects, which include:
breast pain, bloating, hot flashes (hot flashes...seriously? seriously?...) enlargement of ovaries (which can be painful), nausea, and headache. From what I came across on webmd.com, enlargement of the ovaries is the most common side effect.

Oh, and did I mention Clomid can possibly increase the likelihood of multiples? Not that I mind that at all. Once I become pregnant, I won't care how many are in my belly...just as long as they're healthy! But it is something to think about and wonder how the situation would be handled.

So anyway, this week is a new week. I'm going to start exercising again and start caring about what I eat. PLEASE keep me accountable. I need it.

On the sunnyside...

Breakfast today was pretty great. I actually had time to sit down, and I had:

1 slice of healthy life white bread topped with cinnamon sugar and butter
4 pieces of Oscar Mayer bacon

Crazy as it seems, it lasted me until 12. Of course, I was in a meeting from 9:15 to 10:30, so it distracted me somewhat, but still.

Lunch was one cup of Chunky vegetable beef soup. My stomach began to turn just as I was finishing it, but I consider it an accomplishment that I finished it! Then I had strawberry jello for dessert.

Dinner becomes the hardest meal of the day.
I have NO idea what to cook.
Our staple meals are usually:
Hamburger helper
mac n cheese
spaghetti... (do you see a trend here?)
lasagna
skillet meals that have pasta and chicken
chicken strips and french fries

Wow, looking at that list, no wonder I had issues with carbs. It doesn't help that I have a stressful/busy/crazy job which leaves me with little energy for inventive meals.

So, when you take all of that away...and you couple that with the fact that I am SO SICK of skinless chicken breast... you wonder what else is there? Especially when you grocery shopped for the month before deciding to go low carb.

So, my question to you is:

what is your favorite thing to make that is healthy, low carb, little to no prep, and tasty?

Please put the recipe in your comment, or at least give me some ideas. I am by no means a culinary expert (as I've mentioned before) so simple and easy is the best for me, haha.

[Please and thank you. I know the girls that read this are great cooks, so I'm excited to learn new things!]


On another weird and perhaps scary note, I've noticed today that my kidneys are...aching. (At least, I believe they are my kidneys due to looking at a human map online). It's by no means excruciating. It's a very dull ache, and not constant. I searched a little, and found that there is at least one thread on the web that notes a PCOS girl having slightly aching kidneys after upping her Metformin dosage.
Um... that's a little, scary?

The woman said that once she decreased her dosage and increased it again, she was fine. But I really really really really just want to get through this week, because then I will be on the official recommended dosage.

This is further proof that I don't want to be on this medicine for my whole life. There's no telling what it could end up doing to my kidneys. It appears that there's been no link to Metformin and kidney problems...yet. But it's one of those things that could come out years from now.

In other news, one of my good guy friends and his wife became pregnant several months ago. They found out recently that it's a girl.

Upon finding this out yesterday, I had my first heartsick emotions in a while.

I know that when I do finally become pregnant, I will be happy with whatever gender my precious child is. But, Wesley and I would really really really love to have a girl first.
I struggle being scared (and full of self-pity) that, because my life has been full of dissapointments (pathetic, right? this is so not true...but that is the self-pity part of this), that when we do get past this infertile period, I will try and try for a girl, and will end up with a house of like, four boys.

This is when I get scared.
I mean, seriously. All I can think about is 'Home Improvement', and what Jill had to deal with having three boys in the home (basically four, because her husband was like a big kid). What a nightmare!

I did read an article recently that talked about a woman who has tried so long to have a girl, and kept having boys, and the small heartache she went through. But then someone told her something encouraging: God has entrusted you to raise Godly men. He has given you so many boys because he knows you will raise them as Godly men and leaders.

I thought that was a happy little spin to a potentially depressing situation.

I think once I become pregnant, these thoughts will go on the back burner, and I will be content with whatever.

But oh, wouldn't it be lovely to have an adorable little girl with curly dark brown hair and gorgeous big brown eyes? I can already see her in my head, actually. She's beautiful.

One step at a time. :)

I've lost a human head plus 2 pounds!

I stole this from http://musingsofmrsmount.blogspot.com.

1 pound = a Guinea Pig
1.5 pounds = a dozen Krispy Kreme glazed donuts
2 pounds = a rack of baby back ribs
3 pounds = an average human brain
4 pounds = an ostrich egg
5 pounds = a Chihuahua
6 pounds = a human’s skin
7.5 pounds = an average newborn
8 pounds = a human head
10 pounds= chemical additives an American consumes each year
11 pounds = an average housecat
12 pounds = a Bald Eagle
15 pounds = 10 dozen large eggs
16 pounds = a sperm whale’s brain
20 pounds = an automobile tire
23 pounds = amount of pizza an average American eats in a year
24 pounds = a 3-gallon tub of super premium ice cream
25 pounds = an average 2 year old
30 pounds = amount of cheese an average American eats in a year
33 pounds = a cinder block
36 pounds = a mid-size microwave
40 pounds = a 5-gallon bottle of water or an average human leg
44 pounds = an elephant’s heart
50 pounds = a small bale of hay
55 pounds = a 5000 BTU air conditioner
60 pounds = an elephant’s penis (yep, weights more than his heart!)
66 pounds = fats and oils an average American eats in a year
70 pounds = an Irish Setter
77 pounds = a gold brick
80 pounds = the World’s Largest Ball of Tape
90 pounds = a newborn calf
100 pounds = a 2 month old horse
111 pounds = red meat an average American eats in a year
117 pounds = an average fashion model (and she’s 5’11”)
118 pounds = the complete Encyclopedia Britannica
120 pounds = amount of trash you throw away in a month
130 pounds = a newborn giraffe
138 pounds = potatoes an average American eats in a year
140 pounds = refined sugar an average American eats in a year
144 pounds = an average adult woman (and she’s 5’4”)
150 pounds = the complete Oxford English Dictionary
187 pounds = an average adult man
200 pounds = 2 Bloodhounds
235 pounds = Arnold Schwarzenegger
300 pounds = an average football lineman
400 pounds = a Welsh pony


Haha, what fun stuff. And to think, at the end of all of this, I will have hopefully lost a small bale of hay.

Now, this is where it gets interesting...

I have to admit, I hit a brick wall yesterday.
I don't know what happened, but suddenly, the idea of "healthy" food literally made me sick to my stomach.

I've been ingesting oatmeal, chicken salad, tuna salad, salad, salad, salad for a while now. When I went to make my lunch yesterday morning, I literally gagged at the thought of making another chicken salad concoction (even talking about it now is making me queasy). It doesn't help that this medicine has now transferred from running through my system too quickly (I know, I know, tmi, right?) to making me quite nauseous most of the time. It's hard to catch a break.

So...I have to confess it...
I had a McDouble and a small fry yesterday...and BOY, was it GOOD. However, afterward, my body quickly rejected it. I had another off day today, but luckily, the quantity wasn't a lot, so there's a good chance I still managed to stay within my calorie intake.

I talked to my good friend Jerica on the phone today. She had some very exciting news to tell me (she's pregnant!) and we got to talking about my diagnosis of PCOS and the linking of it to diet. She and her husband have been eating right for a while now, and she actually works at a health food store. They also have their own farm and are selling meats, poultry, etc from it. They believe that most illnesses and conditions can be cured by a change in diet, and I have to agree. I expressed to her that I don't want to stay on this medication for the rest of my life, and I would like to be cured of PCOS. She stated she has researched PCOS and strongly believes that if one just changes their diet, besides losing weight, it will cause the PCOS symptoms to go away.

Long story short, she's going to really try to help me eat right. She told me "we are going to try to get you off this medicine as soon as possible." Boy, did that make me feel EMPOWERED. What's really interesting is what her definition of eating right is. It's definitely unconventional.

72 g of carbs a day. All the saturated fat I want, because since it sustains longer, I will not eat as much of it as I would if I were eating carbs. 1 piece of fruit a day. Focus on veggies and meats. Lots of water and raw milk. No fruit juices. She swears by this, and managed to lose 12 pounds in two weeks by making these dietary adjustments.

Now, I know she probably has a higher metabolism than me, but still...that's a lot of weight to not be starving myself on granola and yogurt. I can have BACON! and STEAK! and EGGS! etc. (of course, I must incorporate yogurts and stuff as well, and not go overboard on the saturated fats). The approach is that if you eat your meats first, you will fill up faster and not eat as much. I'm sure there's more technical reasons, but that's the way I can explain it.

She stated the biggest misconception is that fat in food makes you fat. She says this is just not true, and it's actually the carbs that are making Americans fat. It makes sense, if you ask me, due to how my ob/gyn explained how the body breaks down carbs versus other things. I'm currently supposed to be on a low carb, low sugar diet anyway. So! I am excited about this new chapter in my life!

She has given me a couple of ideas to start off with as far as foods and such.

Also, I think Wesley and I will soon become raw milk drinkers.
It's true.

I've been hearing from many different people for a while now that raw milk is best for you, and that the store-bought milk can actually be harmful. There are so very many health benefits to raw milk. I told Jerica I was a little scared to start, because I was afraid I would get sick. She explained that they currently sell raw milk and haven't had one complaint from first time drinkers. However, she did state that many people have had problems once going from raw milk back to store-bought milk...which really leads me to believe there's so many things in store-bought milk that shouldn't be in there.

So, I'm going to track down a farm and buy from them...illegally, haha. They can only sell it as "pet milk", because it's illegal to sell it for humans to consume. How silly is that? Black marker milk! Supposedly, there's a farm in Jackson. I'm really actually pretty excited about this!

I will let you know how it goes.

Exercising has been placed on the back burner this week, because my current dosage of Metform (1500 mg) has really hit me hard. I have no energy it seems, so it's hard to get to the gym. I'm hoping it gets better.

No aunt flo at this point yet. I have never been so ready for my period in my life. Getting my period means I'm one step closer to conceiving.

I feel like I'm 11 again, hanging on the possibility of menses so I can consider myself a "woman."

Oh dear.

Fruit and veggie intake...

I don't know if you can see that, but it's the recommended daily intake of fruits and vegetables per day. I didn't know there was such a thing. (I know about the food pyramid of course, but I didn't realize there was a table that broke it down into cups!)

Less active women in our age range (19-30):

less active: 1.5 cups fruit, 2.5 cups veggies
moderately active: 2 cups fruit; 3 cups veggies
active: 2 cups fruit, 3 cups veggies

I thought fruit was free game for me in these steps toward healthy living. That appears to not be so.

1 cup of grapes= 16 grapes=104 cals. Now, that wouldn't be that bad, except that this one itsy bitsy measly cup also has... oh, 27 grams of carbs! On the Atkins diet, the recommended intake the first two weeks is 20 grams a day. So, if I were on the Atkins diet, then I would have already spent ALL of my carbs, and then some, on 16 grapes.

I'm trying my hardest to shy away from carbs. It's so hard to believe that one cup of grapes has more carbs in it than 4 oz of yogurt.

The good thing I've begun to notice is, now that I'm staying away from caffeinated drinks, sweets, etc., I'm starting to notice I have a lower tolerance for it. In fact, when Wesley and I went shopping yesterday, I had to buy oj with 50% less sugar because when I try to drink it in the morning, it's too sweet for me!

I'm praising God about this. I just hope I don't fall back into bad habits like before.

I am just two pounds away from losing 10 pounds!!! YAY!!!