Wishful thinking..

Ok, I have exactly fifteen minutes to get to work, and I'm typing a quick blog. 

I think I'm going to be late. Oh well. 

So, the past two nights I've taken my Metformin late, so I'm chalking it up to that so I don't get my hopes up. Anyway, I have been  TIRED TIRED TIRED lately. I'm talking feeling like I'm on some allergy meds. 

But of course, me trying to conceive, I can't help but wonder "what if this tiredness is really more, as in, one of the most common signs of pregnancy?" 

I know, I'm making this much more difficult for myself. 

Oh, and of course, Wesley and I went out to eat with a couple who is expecting, and she's in the early stages. Well, she started talking about how she gets up to pee at least once a night now, and Wesley says "Well, Ashley does that now!" And the girl said "Really?" And I said "Well yeah, but it's mostly because I get really thirsty right before I go to bed and I end up drinking a lot of water." And of course, she says the inevitable.... me too!

Now, that is just not kind. Because I will then analyze over and over again and question the possibility of me being pregnant. Yes, the thirst before bed has become a recent thing, and when she talked about having a thirst that's never quenched, I thought "that is SO me." 

But, I am so sick and tired of seeing negatives on pregnancy tests that I can't even bring myself to try to test. I'm so sick of getting my hopes up and having them dashed into pieces. So, I'm praying that if this is the REAL deal, it will become evident before I test. But, I highly doubt I'm pregnant.

One can wish, though. Say a little prayer for me that I can make it through this loooong day.